i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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