discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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