found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
