just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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