Christians are straight up FREAKS
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
