I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
