She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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