Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
