I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
