; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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