So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize