We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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