he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
