so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I just had sex on a roof
How does it feel to date your dad?
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