Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
