Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize
