Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
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