kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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