I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I just found a bag of teeth...
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Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
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My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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