we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
