I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
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