He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
