how do flat chested girls get laid?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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