So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
