Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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