if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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