The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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