haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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