I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Randomize
