I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize