I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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