its not stalking. its research.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
