Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?

(313): View more from Michigan

YES

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(586): If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct? (313): YES http://tfl.nu/udyu

Replies (14) Good night (2068) Bad night (425)
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(514): View more from Quebec

Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?

(1-514): View more from Quebec

Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.

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(514): Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"? (1-514): Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan. http://tfl.nu/v19o

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(415): View more from California

I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.

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(415): I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me. http://tfl.nu/6ugc

Replies (15) Good night (627) Bad night (2041) Order T-Shirt
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(805): View more from California

I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.

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(805): I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense. http://tfl.nu/syxd

Replies (27) Good night (6907) Bad night (506) Order T-Shirt
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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.

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(709): I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again. http://tfl.nu/ujyy

Replies (19) Good night (5742) Bad night (523) Order T-Shirt
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(609): View more from New Jersey

IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU

(1-609): View more from New Jersey

I don't want it.

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(609): IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU (1-609): I don't want it. http://tfl.nu/jvul

Replies (36) Good night (1016) Bad night (7717) Order T-Shirt
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(510): View more from California

answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.

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(510): answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it. http://tfl.nu/6rsg

Replies (6) Good night (1306) Bad night (5268) Order T-Shirt
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(440): View more from Ohio

i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.

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(440): i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too. http://tfl.nu/6m2a

Replies (15) Good night (1138) Bad night (2810) Order T-Shirt
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(406): View more from Montana

she pinky promised me she was 18

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(406): she pinky promised me she was 18 http://tfl.nu/cbo2

Replies (67) Good night (7853) Bad night (2898) Order T-Shirt
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(714): View more from California

Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.

(562): View more from California

You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.

(714): View more from California

Well someones bitter they didn't get any.

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(714): Hahaha you puked all over his shirt. (562): You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch. (714): Well someones bitter they didn't get any. http://tfl.nu/4mgl

Replies (20) Good night (5090) Bad night (1273)
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(862): View more from New Jersey

Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.

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(862): Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea. http://tfl.nu/cd70

Replies (2) Good night (2513) Bad night (1100) Order T-Shirt
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?

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(402): I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category? http://tfl.nu/je1r

Replies (17) Good night (2738) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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(601): View more from Mississippi

No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.

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(601): No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911. http://tfl.nu/s9ui

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(512): View more from Texas

Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"

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(512): Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!" http://tfl.nu/rhjr

Replies (1) Good night (694) Bad night (352) Order T-Shirt
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(515): View more from Iowa

We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place

(1-515): View more from Iowa

I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck

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(515): We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place (1-515): I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck http://tfl.nu/93u8

Replies (2) Good night (468) Bad night (150)

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