we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Randomize
