i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize