Those balls look pretty dangerous.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
