i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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