U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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