and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
