i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Actions speak louder than pants.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
