and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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