How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
