Dual....:-)
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
