Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
In America we eat man semen.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
