O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I could fuck to npr.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
