is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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