I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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