We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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