Banned from zoo.
Again?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
