no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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